New Year's Wish

The collective sigh is reverberating across the country... The Holiday season is almost through. The stressful ones are over (unless you are hosting a New Year's Eve party, which I am not!) . I love this gelatinous week in between the 26th and the 2nd. There are still sugar and fat to be found in most homes. The work schedule is lax, or at least most of us pretend it is. Throw another log on the fire, put the kettle on for another cup of tea, or better yet how about some of that homemade Baileys? Lounging and general slothfulness is accepted. (In my house it is encouraged, unless you're a teenager, and that is the only gear you ever move in).

Then what? The mania begins for most of us. Lofty expectations of oneself begin to hail down. The clean fresh start of a New Year is already polluted with pressure. Week one's dogma is week three's apathy or despair.

I know, I do it too. Already my mind is poking my relaxing week in the ribs whispering curse words like, "cellulite - mucking out the house - paperwork" etc. "This year is going to be...blahblahblah"

I am going to remind myself again and again (It's like brushing my teeth, once isn't enough.)

Destruction happens in seconds. Creation takes time. When we decide to implement change, we want it NOW and we want lasting results. Think of any time in your life when there has been lasting change that happened immediately. I can think of the sudden death of loved ones, loss of a job, and cutting my hair off (no really, I mean ALL of it OFF!) that felt like it lasted forever.

Then I think of building businesses, relationships, or growing my hair back out. The headway that was made bit by bit day after day. Small, consistent, and less than spectacular. This is the kind of change that is actually sustainable. There is name or a method to this approach, "Kaizen".

Earlier this holiday season I noticed myself feeling lousy because I was eating more junk than my body is accustomed to. My intellect donned it's dictator mustache and declared, "That's it! Enough with the garbage gut! You are allowed nothing but water and kale, before you poison yourself and rot out your teeth."

My inner child FREAKED out, immediately seeking fudge and revenge. Thankfully a shower of sanity fell from the heavens, resulting in Kaizen: "If I eat a piece of fruit each day and 1 raw veggie, go ahead have the cookies!" whew. Amazing. The charge around the junk food was gone. I didn't even want the fudge anymore. (Yes I did have some the other day) My point being, this is manageable. I like fruit, especially with breakfast. I also enjoy snacking on carrots, celery, and peppers. For me this was so easy, I could not fail. Did I lose weight? nope. Did I gain weight? nope. Did I enjoy myself, food, drink, friends and family? YES!

As I move into the new year I will continue this practice, even when the cookies are gone. I like the habit I am creating, It feels good in my mind and body. I have not yet decided what my next Kaizen step will be this January, but I do know it's going to be easy, and I'm going to succeed!

This year I propose trying this approach. Experience a way of being softer, gentler, steady, gradual, thoughtful, and probably successful.

Pick one thing, and start there. Make it so easy you can not possibly fail.

Happy New Year!

What does Sacred mean to you?

What happened to Sacred Ceremony?

There are still remnants of the rich tapestry of Ritual and Ceremony lingering...

The wedding ceremony, baptism, bar/bat-mitzvah, graduation are some of the remaining threads of culture marking our passage through life's doorways.

Many of us have left the religions of our heritage and in doing so, we have thrown out Ceremony and Ritual.

Can it still exist without religion? What if it could be larger, inclusive, modern, ancient, serious, fun, or anything you desired it to be?

Inside the details, lives the cause to be witnessed, celebrated, and supported.

Ritual is an act of consciously opening ourselves to the presence of our own Spirit. Pressing pause on the rushed routine of life to say, "Hey wait a minute. Check this out, something is happening and this matters!"

We design rituals to bring ourSelves to a deeper place of reverence. Creating physical metaphors to signify, acknowledge, and honor the change that is underway.

Ceremony holds ourSelf, loved ones, and our Ritual, in celebration.

Western Culture is starving for the PAUSE. We are begging to be witnessed, upheld, and supported as we embark on our conscious journey of Life!

In this melting pot we are privileged by the influence of so many cultures. If we have no link to the ways of our ancestors, we can still can learn, divine, and collage our own rituals, lush with all that speaks directly to our own soul.

More Than A One Story House

I recently fell in love with the left handed no looking technique.

I drew, painted, laughed and wept. (Special Thanks to Barbara Krauss creativity Coach and artist! www.barbarakrauss.com)

As I prepare to move out of my home that I love, and open up to my next, this came out of me and I am grateful for the medium.

Here is the story, spotted inside the house:

"I have held children growing, tea kettle whistles, and turkey's roasting. I heard the snoring, sobbing, as well as the muffled moans of so much lovemaking. I have worn your bright colors, been caressed by laughter. I could not help but to fall deeply in love with all of you. You have been my family.

I will move with you, hidden in the photo albums, and forever the back drop to your child's memories. Just as you will be kept safe here. Your dance deeply impressed upon my floorboards. Your dreams and your gratitude, the sweetest residue, tucked neatly into my nooks and crannies.

I am well seasoned with love and celebration, prepared to wrap myself around the arriving hearts, dreams, and the next story.

I am more than a one story house."

Thank you for witnessing

The Gift

This stunning painting is called "Sunburst". The beautiful artist is Terri Gerard.



If we are lucky; if we are intentional; if we are growing; if we are
searching; if we are relentless; we may, in our lives be offered a gift.
That gift will not necessarily be wrapped with shiny paper, ribbons and a
big satin bow. That gift may look like anything but a gift. But indeed it
is a gift. The gift I am talking about is the gift of self-reflection.



It may come in the form of a loved one who reacts to you, or who attacks
you. It may come in the form of a friend who embraces you, or rejects you.
The gift may arrive as a business deal that you close, or that you lose. IT
may come with the loss of a loved one that is close to you, or with the
success of a stranger on American Idol. But if you are fortunate, or
intentional; if you are relentlessly searching, and hell-bent on growing, it
will come to you. And this gift will be the realization that your response
is all about you.



For the uninitiated, the prayerless, those victimized by life and those who
are simple not ready, the fit will be offered. It has been offered to each
of us a hundred times a day, a thousand times a month.
How is this possible? That we would be offered a gift but say "no"? This
is part of the gift. A gift can be offered, but until I am ready to receive
it, the gift will be sent back: no such number. Moved, left no forwarding
address.



The beginnings of receiving are those moments where we notice: boy, I really
got hooked there. Or, I wonder why that upset me so much? These are the
beginnings of the gift that keeps on giving: the gift of noticing, of
awareness. Of taking responsibility for our own experience of life and
seeking to expand our ability to receive more and more, so that we can
become more and more. Being responsible for more and more is the game.
One cannot receive without being simultaneously able to hold more, and less.



The alternatives to receiving the gift? A blameless life full of blame for
others. Judging others and remaining separate from them. Pitying yourself
or others and becoming pitiful. Criticizing others and becoming
unacceptable to yourself. Playing alone in the sandbox for fear of exposing
your weakness to yourself.



Here we are, on our journey. If you find yourself in tears, in the flow, in
the arms of another man or woman, know that you have found yourself, with your
million and one reactions, predictions, declarations and early dismissals.
Know that these are not the gifts. Your receiving of these happenings with
your awareness is the gift. To be able to receive the ripple effects of
every action and reaction is the gift and it is offered to you in every
moment. This is a treasure. You are the mine.



IT happens for those persistent enough to look
into the next dimension, where life is the mirror of you.



May you continue to expand your tenderness, your ability to feel, your
asking for and receiving, and all the ins and outs of a life lived fully.
This is my prayer for usall tonight. Amen. Awomen. Aho.

Writing by Karen Blum RadicalDander@blogspot.com

Dancing For Darfur

Day 4 of my teeny tiny commitment to raise funds for displaced persons in a women's refugee camp in Darfur, that just happens to be changing my life...

www.darfurpeace.org/programs/womens-center

This is turning out to be a wild ride on the home front. My husband and son have unexpectedly got involved.

On the second night, having not yet developed a routine time for this dancing, I came home exhausted and ready to crawl into bed and slip into heavenly slumber. (Just now as I wrote those words a wave of gratitude for having a bed, a deliciously warm cozy soft dry bed, enveloped me. How many nights do I take that for granted?!)

My husband reminded me, "Ahem- didn't you make a promise to dance daily for that Darfur fund raiser?" Uhoh. *gulp* My mind raced for a cop out, something along the lame lines of I'll dance twice as long tomorrow started to form in my mouth. He cut me off with this save the promise invitation, "Come on I'll dance with you!"

As I shuffled thru my ipod searching for the right musical choice, my son hijacked the DJ role and announced, "Mom, if you let me pick the music I'll dance with you too!"

That settled it. For 3 evenings we have turned our living room into a most unlikely dance club. Songs from Jack Black, Flight of the Concord, to Usher have been the soundtrack of this nightly event. This wasn't quite what I had in mind when I signed on. I imagined mySelf lost in the rhythmic sounds of world beats, drumming, chants, and some Nia blends.

This is perfect! All day I look forward to this time together, laughing, busting out sweet faux break dancing moves, and being supported by the 2 most important men in my life! I am so blessed!

Check out the fundraiser, get involved! www.vividlywoman.com/darfur.htm

Stretching ourSelves

There we are! (We are missing a few). Circles to Spirals Sweaty Goddesses surging with life and renewed passion for Sisterhood and ourSelves!

We danced, played, were in ritual, nature, and bliss last weekend!

Here's what I notice after a fabulous weekend of expansion:

I walk back into my life and it feels too small. I grow each time I surrender mySelf to another retreat. No matter what my role at the retreat, Growth is inevitable and somewhat uncomfortable. (Yet not growing is far more painful.)

I feel like Alice in Wonderland, bumping my head on the ceiling of my old life, cramped, and awkward. It takes a few days of maneuvering, lots of rest, writing, oh and let's not forget the crying. Yes the unexplained grief, Who knows? It's just my process. Your is probably quite different. I'm not setting this up for a good sale am I?

Wait I'm not finished... On the other side of it... where I am today are:

waves of creativity

awareness of pure potentiality

elation at the view from up here

a deep calm grounded knowing

It's delicious. Oh yeah, now I remember who I am. I do have a definite purpose, even some clarity, and some kick ass tools I am wielding with ninja like precision!

Kindness Poem

Before you know what kindness really is
you must lose things,
feel the future dissolve in a moment
like salt in a weakened broth.
What you held in your hand,
what you counted and carefully saved,
all this must go so you know
how desolate the landscape can be
between the regions of kindness.
How you ride and ride
thinking the bus will never stop,
the passengers eating maize and chicken
will stare out the window forever.
Before you learn the tender gravity of kindness,
you must travel where the Indian in a white poncho
lies dead by the side of the road.
You must see how this could be you,
how he too was someone
who journeyed through the night with plans
and the simple breath that kept him alive.
Before you know kindness as the deepest thing inside,
you must know sorrow as the other deepest thing.
You must wake up with sorrow.
You must speak to it till your voice
catches the thread of all sorrows
and you see the size of the cloth.
Then it is only kindness that makes sense anymore,
only kindness that ties your shoes
and sends you out into the day to mail letters and
purchase bread,
only kindness that raises its head
from the crowd of the world to say
it is I you have been looking for,
and then goes with you every where
like a shadow or a friend.

Naomi Shihab Nye

The Journey

One day you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice-
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
“Mend my life!”
each voice cried.
But you didn’t stop.
You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations,
though their melancholy
was terrible.
It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
branches and stones.
But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do-
determined to save
the only life you could save.

-Mary Oliver

sometimes S is for shame

There is a still a part of me creaky with rust, not quite decomposed that clenches onto the inherited shame stories of sickness.

I have fallen sick 3 x since the Solstice, I feel the shame unleashed.

Confusion. Hypocrisy?. Why the healthy lifestyle, if health isn't the result?

What old religious debris hangs on whispering, "I am bad- this a punishment."?

Ruby drives solo to Austin TX. Our road trip left up to her. Healing my body left up to me.

There are other voices soothing, singing, and chanting truths to remind me and bring in presence.

My head keeps asking, what should I do? I hear, "just be" my body resonates.

One of my NSA practioners, Brian Lumb, once explained to me, every time we build another floor on the tower of our being, we immediately return to the basement. The foundations need checking. Are there any cracks?

I've been doing a lot of Self building, expanding and I found some cracks...

I am grateful for the opportunity to be. Just be. To rest, dream, soak in the bath, cocoon at home, and heal.

Ruby Dee, I'm gonna make that road trip to Austin with you one day! Just you wait and see...

The Force of Life

Just received these powerful words from Karen Blum, one of the amazing women on my Circle.

But you can suppress it, and like water, like the feminine, like emotion, it will rise up again, appear, make itself known, seep through, humanifest, womanifest, find its level, and suddenly what was only hinted at, longed for , deeply hidden, becomes splendid and on display, in the midst of a streaming white light dripping with blood of menses, of murder, of childbirth, of ripped hymens, of bleeding hearts, of ecstasy lost and wisdom comes pouring forth again as women reuse and refind their voices, their byways and scarcely trodden highways, their footpaths, their natures, their longings, their strongings, their weakness, their meekness, their pouring forth into abundance, gratitude and heat, their surrender of pain and rebirth into the privilege of speaking, laughing, storytelling, moaning, giggling. Celebrating, ululating, until the secret pathways and shrotas and incense trails and lacy fingers on the backs and behind and gaping pussy holes become mouths and voices, all of them ululating in the ancient cries of woman’s voice. Woman’s voice. Women’s voices raised in singing, crying, lullabying, joking, laughing, bubbling, giggling, whispering, praising, raising, phrasing, all good, all loving, all flowing in the ceremonial space that is woman. She is crafted for ceremony, naturally spiritual, connected, needing no form. We are the form. Built for loving, being loved; cradling, being cradled: there is no life without woman. We are life. We are drive. We are power. We are desire.

Celebrate yourself. Wake up to the music that is you.
Lift your head to whiff the smouldering incense that you are.

Shield your eyes as your gaze is brightened by the radiant white light of your being.

Feel the textures of silk and saliva, velvet and blood, satin and hair that drapes and adorns the fiber you are made of.

Taste the salty you, the sweet you, now the pungent and acrid you; the smoky burning paradise of you, the pickled you, the honeyed you, the candied you, the peppermint and rose hips of you.

You are the embodiment of all of life.

You are a celebration.

Your are the feast and the feasting, the dinner and the diner, the sup and the superb, the breakfast and the break slow, the snack and the morsel, the taste and the treat, a neverending changing and delicious banquet of woman.

Celebrate! Allow the bells to ring, the drums to beat. Entice the hips to move and the pubic bone to find its own rhythm. Allow the lovers to emerge into the light. Hide yourself no more. Be free. Warm your wings in the sunlight. You are nascent. You are alive Your many voices poised to shout as one, in birth:

Confessions of Self Censorship and Spray Tan...

Enough already! I can't take another second of this self imposed strangulation!

I've been mulling over the possibilities, start a new blog? Throw myself head first into a bag of something fried and salty? I have grossed mySelf out with this Self censoring. In the shackles of supposed professionalism, I have edited out my unique quirky authenticity. For that I am sorry.

From this day forward. while blogging or otherwise...

I will be honestly irreverent!

I am giving mySelf full permission to be the goofball mystic of my soul's choosing!

I will no longer edit my snarky humor, or creative mumblings....

AAAHHH that feels better.

This permission, reminds me of the day I finally came to terms with being a white girl.

Some of my earliest memories are of deep Caucasian denial.

1) In the horse field with a friend rubbing our limbs down with dark earth and admiring our amazing tans!

2) In preschool using marker (the cinnamon scented kind) to color my skin. I was interrupted by the call to snack before I turned into the bronze Goddess I was creating- I did however lose marker privileges for the remainder of the week.

3) In the bath staring at my oh so mundane pale skin, practicing my illusive super powers, while chanting my first mantra "I am tan, I am tan, I am tan, I am tan, I am tan ( No you are NOT-doh!)

4) Imagining I was the Coppertone girl with her little puppy (remember her?)

The list is longer, and more detailed as I began imagining I was all sorts of exotic beauties. Every race except mine! Remember the first fake tanning lotions? Q2? Nothing says junior high like orange streaky skin!

Or the slippery summers spent slathered in baby oil...brown for a season.

Just a few years ago I fell prey to my siren fantasy again (no really)- this time in the form of a spray tan. Someone tell me why these places are still in business? Never have I scrubbed my elbows, feet, ankles, and wrists sooo long and hard. SCARY! Then as it wore off I just looked dirty, not a glowing woman of color? no not even a tan whitey!

And so, after over 3 decades of racial self struggle. I buckled. I just gave in to what was, what is.

AAAHHhhhhhh that feels better! Accepting me, just as I am.

Let's remind each other: it's perfectly ok to be me...to be you... just as we are!

Joy quest

"Don't ask what the world needs.

Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it.
Because what the world needs is people who have come alive."
– Howard Thurman

I learned something this morning about Gandhi. He was inspired by Tolstoy. It was after reading Tolstoy's ideas on passive resistance that he envisioned a Way.

That thread of inspired love is woven through out our history. Over the centuries, how many average human beings awoke to it? Outgrowing "average", swelling with the confidence of peace to invoke the masses and alter the world as we know it.

Blasting away the age old lie of "That's just the way it is"!

"Reasonable people adapt to the world, unreasonable people adapt the world to themselves. Therefore all progress is left up to the unreasonable people!"

-George Bernard Shaw

Conscious Eating Playshop

Yesterday I was joined by 7 precious women who came together courageously and opened up their hearts and voices to share, learn, and heal their relationships with food and their bodies.

This Playshop was particularly personal and even a little scary for me. I stepped out of the shame of my herstory of eating disorders, and embraced the gift of that wound. I experienced a deeper healing in telling my old food story, and passing on what I have learned through out my slow decade of healing and new consciousness around food, and my body!

I was especially touched and inspired by one of the women, who is living quite a unique life. This fabulous lively woman is blind and deaf , she is also a single mother of two! Wow! What a blessing to meet her and see the power of intention, attitude, and curiosity!

I look forward to September's Playshop "Creating More Time". Sept 25 th 1-4 pm.

If your first thought was, "I can't do that, I'm just too busy", then make the time for this Playshop, I created it just for you! We will look at the time and energy leaks in our lives. Learn a brilliant system for weekly scheduling that allows us to accomplish goals that reflect what is most important to us.

Let's question the story of "Getting it all done", and explore how to enjoy time with family and friends, and still have time for ourSelves! And yes we can still fulfill the mundane tasks with mindfulness, and proper priority placement. It is possible, come learn how!

Register now www.Mayawholehealth.com

Remembering our loveliness

I think of a story Wayne Dyer tells about a tribe in Africa. When a person of that tribe screws up, everything stops. Everyone who knows that person comes to surround them. One by one they go before the person and tell them the happy memories, the great qualities they have, and recount each time they remember this person acting in kindness. The idea is that if we can remember who we truly are, if we can reconnect to our essential Self we will only act from that place. If someone messes up, it is only that they have temporarily forgot who they are. It is the job of the family and whole community to remind that person of their greatness. In this tribe these episodes of "crime" happen only about every 5 years. There are a couple thousand people in this tribe...

Meditation is working it's magic. There is space around myself and the lesson I am in. A space that liquifies or gels time and judgment into a clay of sorts. Without the push of time or divisions of judgement I sense possibility. Pain is rich with possibility. As the wave crests and swallows possibility I can cry. I can feel my way through it emerging into possibility again, this is the rhythm.

How to Break Through Suffering:
A Reorganizational Healing Perspective

Last time we described how we create suffering by: making the experience all-pervasive and seem permanent, taking it personally, feeling helpless and option-less, avoiding the experience, giving it a name (conceptualizing it) and making it seem real, and feeling separate.

We also presented "Why would anyone WANT to learn how to fully suffer?" and the transformative power of being fully with the experience (instead of the stories or concepts that perpetuate suffering) even for an instant.

Now, how do we break down the system of suffering? What steps must we take to move through and experience the real energy underneath? As all suffering is in the avoidance of suffering, the following list of options helps us to be fully with what is, dissolving our concept of suffering:

1. Find a way to make the experience merely scary without needing to put a story or label on it.Example: "I'm frightened of the pain I feel in my back" is different, and more real, than "I might have cancer, I may never walk again, it's my karma, God is punishing me, etc"
2. Fully experience and define the painful experience as it is. Define its borders and depth in your body, the quality of the sensation, the color, the sound, the flavor, the rhythm in it, everything that can be SENSED. No story about it, no meaning, no name/diagnosis - just the sensations.
3. Find a way to make the experience or concept even slightly impermanent. Notice the times when your focus is on other things and you don't experience suffering. Find what other experience you put in the front of your mind that makes suffering irrelevant (something pleasurable, peaceful, exciting, etc).
4. Remember that others have or have had the same type of experience. Suffering is a mindtrip that says you're utterly alone, and at its worst will warp your self-esteem to gain significance - "king of the garbage pile". You are so much bigger than this! Others can and do understand.
   
5. Find something else that can be changed in life. It may be that the pain or story will never change, but the charge can come off so you can go on in your life. Forget fighting it - that keeps it alive. If it never changed, how would you live life? What is the wisdom in this experience?
6. Ask the suffering to intensify and expand from its location until it fills every part of you. The fear is that if we feel it, we will die, yet that fear is a kind of living death. Reclaim the power to dive in and fully experience it in every cell, and then ask it, "Is this the best you've got?" When you do this, you cannot be helpless.

All it takes is to look at one part of the story we use to avoid suffering and realize that it's not true, and we lose our servitude to suffering.

This practical advice on living is brought to you from, Center of The Universe Network Care, office of Dr. Matthew howe. 2622 NW Market St Suite C Seattle Wa

check them out at centeroftheuniverse.com!

Hey out there to all the Power Mamas! Those of us raising our babes, raising our businesses, and raising ourSelves in the process.

I am just reminded that while I'm out there inspiring light in others, coaching my peeps back to them Selves, there is one privilege before me that is greater than ANY event, client, presentation, contract or contact.

It's the life I am cradling and shaping, the life I brought into the world, my baby who is a boy turning man. A teenager ready to take on the world, so cool, curious, and creative! no matter how he distances himSelf from me, it's fleeting. He's right there telling me about the latest band, the coolest video game, (Yes, even raised a Waldorf kid, for those of you with younger children, those of you still having your idealism in tact..allow me to shatter it for you!) It's all about Facebook, and heavy metal, or punk rock these days (came with the summer mohawk)

The details aren't important, what I'm getting at is the freedom in throwing out the idealism, in releasing my agenda for him.

When I show up present, authentic, open, (like I would for you or a client) I become curious and entertained by who he is becoming. It's all about the questions, deep listening, checking in with my neutrality. Continually tossing out the judgments, the assuming. When the alarms go off, asking more questions. Over and over again I find the gold inside him. I find an open minded young man exploring ideas, styles, questioning authority (mine included) The rules remain in place, he is held strong. He knows how to think, not what to think! He pulls out values along with his logic. Often I find myself learning new facts that open my mind. Suspending my lecturing, and know it all attitude, the connection we have is secured. I don't believe we have to lose our teenagers. I do believe it is up to us to stay open and curious about there process. Maybe that is just more idealism, for now I'll keep trying it, it seems to be working.

I saw a bumper sticker yesterday, it read: The most important thing you can spend on you kids is TIME!

This is the most important position I will EVER hold in life! Showing up for our children is mandatory! Not just in that drive you around, wash your laundry, "did you do your homework" sort of way, but in that REAL heartfelt way. Don't check that message, let the e-mail be...climb into your child's reality, instead of trying to drag them into yours!

Here are some must have tools....

Earnest Listening

Conscious communication

Intentional touch

Energy awareness

Maybe I should start teaching these allies to more than just the Beauty Industry????

I am so excited to be offering a new 4 part "Essential Balance" series!

Sign up now at mayawholehealth.com!

Let's cut through the confusion and debris of life, and get back to the basics!

I have designed these playshops, to provide a simple path back to the building blocks of balanced mind, emotions, spirit, and body.

How do we bring balance into our lives?

Meditation: An intro to Meditation. Creating balance through stillness. This is the essential groundwork for a life of harmony, health, and ease! Sample different meditation styles, de-mystify common meditation myths, learn about the health benefits! Design a practice that fits your unique lifestyle!

July 17, 1-4 pm

Conscious Eating: The Art of Eating! Food issues? Weight issues? Examining our relationship with food? Bringing awareness back into mealtime.

This is a hotspot for many, and one of the foundations for health of mind, body, emotions, and spirit! (There is no agenda, vegetarian, or otherwise in this offering!)

Aug 21, 1-4 pm

Time Management: Creating time to live the life we long to be living! Identifying time and energy leaks. Examining priorities and designing a practical schedule and strategy that allows us to live in alignment with our long term goals, feeling balanced and stress free, while accomplishing what we deem to be really important!

Sept 18, 1-4 pm

Financial Focus: A practical system for prosperity! This is NOT a Law of Attraction wkshp! Learn to how to apply 4 ACTION steps that allow for abundance through discipline, awareness, and balance!

Oct. 23, 1-4 pm

change, what else?

Occasionally the changes I've been striving toward sneak up on me. There are no marching bands announcing a leap of consciousness. The little blurps toward wholeness aren't riding in on the tails of a raw food, yoga, meditation weekend.

This latest surprise came after spending a week away from 2 of my loves. One being my husband, the other being dance. While my son and I were enjoying my best friend and her family in Sant Fe (Il Vicino, you'll always be my favorite Italian restaurant!) , my man was enjoying a weekend dance workshop with the world champions of west coast swing, and most of our dance community!

Which leads me to my admission of, often times feeling left out and angry when I don't get to be doing all the fun things everywhere all the time. My inner 2 yr old comes out to reek havoc. This has been a pattern that I've played with more times than I can count. But... But...

All week I kept waiting for the sudden pang, the mounting panic ("everyone is having more fun than I am"). Even if in states of bliss this pattern has struck like lightening. I have a sort of PTS about it. Each time I checked in, the feeling was genuine happiness. I was happy he was able to grow, to learn, to laugh, to dance and play! Yay! (ummm I think they call that love).

He looked into my eyes the other night telling me bits and pieces of the weekend, and it just slipped out. "I had the best dance of my life..." okay, that woke up the 2 yr old! Time slowed way down, I looked at my husband and saw the childlike glimmer in his eyes as he boasted and glowed. A tenderness sprang forth and I knew it was ok, it wasn't about me. My inner 2 yr old wanted to be the best dance of his life yes it's true...but hey his life isn't over! I shushed her and she fell back to sleep. I held the space for his story, for his accomplishment, and my heart opened back up! WOW!

I haven't mentioned any of this to him, it's my goofy evolution game. But I think the excitement he had as he shared with me, might've felt a little like the excitement I feel right now sharing with you!

Impeccability ( harder to live than spell!)

This is the season of my awareness of impeccability. It is now that I am diving deeper and realizing it on a whole new level.

Every voicemail that isn't responded to, e-mail left unanswered, or bill in wait of payment, these are the small things, yet they slash the energy sail, create small blockages, damming up the flow and ease of what I am manifesting.

What then about the relationships in disrepair and disregard? The wounds inflicted consciously or otherwise, and yet now as I am wiser...I know I had my piece in the destruction.

That heavy burden I have been carrying for weeks, unable to set down, until now. I set it down, and use impeccability as my guide. I groom every detail of what I am responsible for, lovingly. Knowing its the energy behind my actions.

Today I commit to working and playing in the spirit of being impeccable:

~With my word

~With my time

~With my thoughts

~With my actions

I make amends with all my relations. I make amends with mySelf.

“The body is fundamental and necessary for the realization of the Divine Intention” ... Rumi

I am tired. It's a good tired, the kind a 20 minute nap might take care of.

Today I am pondering commitment. Reveling in the sweetness of the staying.

Depak Chopra's "7 Spiritual Laws" made commitment come to life for me. Before it felt so stagnant and rigid. Now I am understanding the deep textures and constant change that make commitment feasible. The flexibility necessary to navigate the changing conditions of life while staying the course.

I write my intentions each week. Some intentions remain the same, others change. I write them juicy and larger than life sometimes. Other weeks I write them gently, subtle and more focused. Each morning I say them out loud, a declaration of my path. A reminder to my intellectual, emotional, and physical body of what my Spirit is suggesting I hold in this day's awareness. My internal GPS, a compass for my intentional life.

Then I go into meditation. Sitting to notice. Some days my breath and clarity only illume for 3 breaths, the rest is watching the mind thrash. Once in a while it is heaven. Perfect silence, body humming, timeless, breath, light, everything/nothing. Regardless each day I show up, check in, and calibrate.

This practice has changed my life. It has kept me motivated thru the lulls, the doldrums, and the frustrating details of birthing a dream, as well as kept me calm in the exciting bliss when I want to shout from the rooftops.. instead I am harnessing that energy to keep on my path...to stay committed.

Thank you Depak!

Circle within a Circle.

We are powerful in community!

What a beautiful weekend with new sisters, my family keeps growing.

Thank you Dina for our "Going Deeper" choreography wkshp. Filled with magic, laughter, tears, and power!

by Jewel Mathieson

We have come to be danced
not the pretty dance
not the pretty pretty, pick me, pick me dance
but the claw our way back into the belly
of the sacred, sensual animal dance
the unhinged, unplugged, cat is out of its box dance
the holding the precious moment in the palms
of our hands and feet dance

We have come to be danced
not the jiffy booby, shake your booty for him dance
but the wring the sadness from our skin dance
the blow the chip off our shoulder dance
the slap the apology from our posture dance

We have come to be danced
not the monkey see, monkey do dance
one, two dance like you
one two three, dance like me dance
but the grave robber, tomb stalker
tearing scabs & scars open dance
the rub the rhythm raw against our souls dance

WE have come to be danced
not the nice invisible, self conscious shuffle
but the matted hair flying, voodoo mama
shaman shakin’ ancient bones dance
the strip us from our casings, return our wings
sharpen our claws & tongues dance
the shed dead cells and slip into
the luminous skin of love dance

We have come to be danced
not the hold our breath and wallow in the shallow end of the floor dance
but the meeting of the trinity: the body, breath & beat dance
the shout hallelujah from the top of our thighs dance
the mother may I?
yes you may take 10 giant leaps dance
the Olly Olly Oxen Free Free Free dance
the everyone can come to our heaven dance

We have come to be danced
where the kingdom’s collide
in the cathedral of flesh
to burn back into the light
to unravel, to play, to fly, to pray
to root in skin sanctuary
We have come to be danced
WE HAVE COME

The dust of life is settling.

This week was the Sensual Heart Dance http://www.vividexistence.com/WTWW_event_Seattle.htm

It was a beautiful gathering of women dancing to create change! We raised awareness and money for survivors of war.

It is horrifying what is happening there. Women being used as weapons of war, as rape destroys individual lives, families and communities. What is a even greater tragedy is that we who have so many freedoms, privileges and luxuries know this is going on, and yet we choose to do nothing.

What if everyone of us just picked one thing, anything that calls to your heart, and we choose to acknowledge the pain of another, to left a finger to give aid, and our one small act eased another's suffering, or changed many lives????

What if?

We would be the change we are seeking in the world!

Here are some links if you wish to learn more about the Sensual Heart Partners:

http://www.darfurpeace.org/programs/womens-center- recipient of live tour funds raised

http://womenthrive.org/- recipient of virtual tour funds raised

http://womenspeacecollection.com/- Inkind sponsor providing baskets for raffle and director of the Darfur Peace Women's Center basket weaving cooperative

Just about the time I teach something...

I am slammed back into the universal classroom.

I've come to believe we teach exactly what we are learning, over and over and over again.

I am diligently taking the left brain steps to bring what I do to the world in a shiny box. Soon I will magically appear on your screen.

This grueling process is perfect. It is the opportunity of a lifetime. How do I show up authentically for cyberspace?

I had a rather psychedelic awakening from a nap this afternoon. Have you ever woke up and had no ego? No grasp on time or space, let alone the "who am I, what am I doing here?" part!

The sensation seems to go on forever and yet it is over in an instant. It left me with this urgency, a reminder of something I keep forgetting and can never quite articulate...

One of my teachers, Wilbert Alix, says “ immediate felt

experience is a determining factor in our aliveness in each

moment”. Alberto Villoldo, another shamanic teacher, says that

the difference between religion and spirituality is that religion is

based on beliefs, while spirituality is based on experience. I

would emphasize experience here to mean the immediate felt

experience, that Alix speaks of above, also referred to as felt

sense experience

A word from one of my teachers, Leela Francis, quoting her teachers.

Just checking out the foundations, looking for cracks, before I build another story.

My next story is career transformation. After 20 years in the same business, it is time to expand this sweet and bitter Beauty Industry.

I prefer sculpture and the earthy funk of the barbershop. There is something gritty and real in the creating of those illusions.

We have a unique position behind that chair. We are creating art that people will not only buy, but they will walk around with it displayed their heads! Read that again and take yourSelf a little more seriously.

What I have learned about the Industry is a lot about human connection.

I am teaching what I know a lot about, what I have mastered. What has built me a thriving, beating the doors down, loyal to the death, amazing clientele.

The arts of:

~Energy Awareness

~Earnest Listening

~Intentional Touch

~Conscious Communication

~Career and Life visioning

This has been an oversight. Up until now the Education has been all outward application techniques. The people weren't ready for more, but all that is changing...