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| Mom bought me this piece by Jana Joy last week. The timing is uncanny. |
What has happened to me? Here there is only bliss... forever, the purest sweetest Love.
There's so much happening that I'm torn between cataloging the events and sudden upgrades, or staying in the intoxicating flow of it all. It's happening to me. I'm becoming. Becoming what? The Oracle, the Seer, everyone, nature, Her (and sometimes Him, then Us), I am the Beloved as are You. And I'm in love with Us. So yeah that. (Is this awkward?) Wtf? Seriously though, it's just what is so.
Nothing is personal anymore, and yet it deeply is. Each breath his a paradox. Inhaling the first breath of being born, and exhaling the last breath before dying. This is eternity in one blink of an eye. The blinks are infinite btw. I understand why the ancient poets wrote as they did. The more concrete the language is, the less accurate. More fluid, less words, more sounds, smiles, and sighs, dancing, playing, these are the truest ways to "talk" about this sacred Remembering.
It is so precious. My gratitude for every second of this life in all it's forms brings me to my knees. Today I even understood the gun shots ringing through the forest. I wanted to apologize on behalf of the humans to the trees and critters. She stopped me. "I am that, I am." She spoke. "Sometimes I get that way, turning on mySelf and making loud noises like that." Because there are no two sides, duality is an illusion and I get it so clearly.
I actually loved some garbage strewn on the side of the road yesterday. I know it sounds crazy. I saw the trash and waited for the normal flicker of grrrrr to surface. Instead I understood that my past feelings of anger, disappointment, and frustration weren't at the person who had done the littering but at myself (and yes I was that person too somehow). I had been angry that I wasn't doing something about it. If it bothers YOU, then YOU do something about it. The trash registered a tiny blip on my radar, the old self loathing at myself for driving on, expecting someone else to fix it was the source of my suffering. Yesterday there was nothing, only the understanding of what had been occurring, accompanied by wave after wave of unconditional love.
My image reflected in the mirror keeps shapeshifting. Sometimes I want to cry at the innocence and child like human expression I am, the boundless joy and quirky nature has me blinking back tears. Other times I see a aged corpse like being and I stare at it, finding love in my heart for every version of me, for every version of You too. I see your pain bodies clearly and I love them too.
I hear the voice telling me that if I write these words and make these kind of proclamations I'll be labeled as straight up crazy, delusional, and lose all credibility. To that voice I say, "I don't care, my Love, I'm not here to impress anyone, only to give voice to what is available and happening to Us right now. There is much more going on and I do have an awareness of what might be too much to say right now. I'll keep many of these ascension miracles to mySelf for bit longer.
I'll leave you with this. It has been and is a gradual shifting and a tenacious inner nudging. I followed it, leaving behind, homes, husbands, careers, friends, and more. I stayed in the fire and wept the tears, screamed the screams, apologized and forgave it All. Each time I stayed with it and said yes, the voice grew stronger. I followed it to India, where angels came to visit me. They bombarded me with information, colors, and love. Imagine those were rays of the sun. As I allowed that sun to warm my skin, the rays dissipated and all that there was became the sun, even me. That's the best analogy I can give. Every cell in my body redesigned itself to accommodate God. Yet as I write that word, it feels flimsy and I laugh at how inept it is at describing the Beloved that we are.
In the meantime I'll keep observing my language. Because language creates, and it most often creates separation, keeping us divided and believing there is an enemy. If some darkness has come to you, do not shy away, for it was yours all along and is only returning asking to be let back into your light. Once integrated it is returned to Love. Trust yourSelf. You really do have all the answers (yeah they might be in seed form. If you inquire, wait, and follow that divine thread of your own knowing, they will germinate). You really are that precious and cherished.
I'll keep you posted. This is so fun, did I mention the FUN??!!!
