Sweet  Autumn has arrived and we love to sing its praises, the coziness of dawning a sexy sweater, pumpkin spice everything, we can even cuddle in bed again with out sweating all over each other.

Yeah well that’s not the cute stuff I’m going to talk about today. So turn off the smooth jazz and button up your coat.

There’s a cool shadowy undercurrent that hisses quietly in the background. The days are shorter, which means there’s more darkness, more shadow time. Yes more things to run away from and more nooks and crannies to hide our shit in.

 It’s the time of year when the veils between the worlds grow thin. The voices of guides, ghosts, and mystery speak to you from the other side. The leaves of last season are falling leaving you bare and exposed. You want to conceal yourself in a mountain of bite size candy bars and their empty wrapper corpses.

What I’m trying to say is from now til Dec. 31^st your inner demons want to dance. Every self-sabotaging trick in the book is offering itself for the taking as you’re scrambling to keep your most creepy stuff hidden. The habits you gave up ages ago, those little goblins are knocking at your door.

What should you do???? Work more of course. No I’m kidding. I just said that because its one of the masks I have used in the past to dodge my dharma darts and stay hidden. Here are a few ideas I am presently exploring.

1.)  Whoaa Nellie!

Slow down and examine my motives. Just exactly WTH am I doing this for? Honestly what is behind this 3rd glass of wine I’m mentally pouring on a weeknight cozied up next to my laptop?

A quick inquiry can get my sane self back in the drivers seat, avoiding debauchery and wreckage. It can also reveal some emotions I’ve been stifling. Yeah that’s right, cry it out girl!

2.)  Check your peeps!

Surround yourself with people who have your highest in mind. Who you surround yourself not only influences you, it defines you! Who has your back? Who will call you out with love, rather than commiserating with your sob stories?

I recently joined another mastermind circle of strong women who are willing to stretch and shine. This is a safe place to declare what I’m creating, give updates, and state what is in the way (so I can get it out of the way!).

3.)  Just say it already!

Yep I’m talking about the dreaded uncomfortable conversations. The shit in the shadows, the elephant in the room, the honesty you’ve been gagging on for too long, just say it.

It’ll be scary. It might even cause a storm. But that storm will toss truths

onto the shore that will set everyone involved free. Say it with love, keep it simple, straight to the point, and then afford them the time to digest it. This isn’t about being blamey, whiny, or cruel. It is about clearing the air, re-establishing boundaries and finding out what the other person’s needs are.

All that valm you’ve been avoiding is making you a weirdo, but not in a good way. You’re jaded, unavailable, and unable to trust. Let it go, turn the light on and watch the cockroaches scatter!

That’s what I’ve been up to and I suspect it might just be working.

I invite you to harness this full moon’s auspicious potency and elegantly strip off your costume, throw away your bag of tricks and treats, step out of the shadows to embrace the wise witchy ways of your inner knowing.

Are You Grinding The Gears?

No doubt there has been forward motion. I'm not one to sit around and stagnate.

However as I look back on my progress I notice something I call the "start and stop syndrome". Maybe you can relate...
I come on strong, taking the bull by the horns,  kicking some proverbial ass. Right up until I'm yawning, bored, distracted, scared, wary, confused, or what have you. This cycle has prevailed for years in some way, shape or form. 

I'm done excusing this as "just the way things go." As I examine it further, putting it under the microscope of mindfulness it looks like this:

On the highway of life some cars are totally stalled out, even abandoned. Some have flat tires. Others are driving blindly down the road with a tarp on their windshield crashing into anything in their way. I see cars that are too insecure to even leave the garage. Then I see mine, like someone just learning to drive a clutch. Lurching forward, engine revving, blasting ahead other times killing it and starting over again. Over the years I've made lots of headway, but lordie what a jerky ride!

I get that there is always going to be stop lights along the way. My focus right now is just making graceful transitions through the gears. Keep reading and I'll tell you my simple 3 step plan! (I said simple, not easy.)

1.) Small steps =  sustainable = smooth ride
I know I'm sick of me preaching about the small steps thing too, but damnit it's true! 
Quit taking on so much at once. Pick one small thing and master it. Let the shift become habit. When it's the new default, then move on to the next thing.

2.) Polish the old victories
We all forget. I forget, you forget. Ask yourself, "Where have I already succeeded?" Make a list. Go ahead pat yourself on the back, prance around a little. Then go back and double check that list to see if you're still effectively rocking those things. (I just did that with flossing and found I needed to re-establish my dental dogma.)
Evidence of past victories reminds you that you are in fact, a capable bad ass!

3.) Just For Today
I think AA uses this one a lot. Don't worry about next week or 2 years from now. What are you doing today? Are you staying present? Are you doing your best right now in this moment? There's nothing like overwhelm to extinguish your fire, make you quit before you even start. So don't go there, be here now!

Yeah that's me cruising along in my smooth sexy ride! 
The best part is we get to keep messing it up, changing it up, doing it better, learning and loving. There is no perfect way to do it. F**k perfect just get out there and drive a little better baby!